Movie Musicals

Being raised by a woman who absolutely loved musicals allowed me to watch all sorts of gayish things at a young age under the pretense of culture.  I mean, come on, Danny Kaye?  I certainly never bought him as a straight playa in White Christmas.  I ask you, although it is not a musical, is there really anything gayer than Danny Kaye dressed as a court jester?  Well, probably Judy Garland.  

Whether it was her amazing mannish singing voice, her symbolically gay journey in the Wizard of Oz, or just the fact that she was so fucking fabulous, Judy was a huge part of being gay pre-stonewall.  But for me, as a kid, my love affair with Judy was all about Meet Me in St Louis.  With her high starched collar and her high topped shoes, she made me laugh, cry and YES even fall in love (more with the idea of love than with any particular character), just with her songs.  I still can't listen to her have yourself a merry little christmas without crying, or the mother f@#^ing trolley song without singing along at the top of my lungs (Jill can unfortunately attest to this multiple times).

I also love how hysterical some of the older musicals are.  This scene from Singin' in the Rain has me dying every time I hear it.  And there's something about throwing songs and dances into movies that allows them to be silly without seeming cheesy.  Take my favorite song from Singin' in the Rain, good morning (I assume about a threesome-man-sandwich).  Where else can you dance with your own wet coats without looking like a bunch of idiots?  One of the better examples of a whole movie that would seem ridiculous were it not for the singing and dancing is Bye Bye Birdie.  I personally have  a special place in my heart for the 90s tv version as opposed to the 60s version, maybe because I find it to be so very campy.

All these reasons and more are why I feel sick to my stomach when people don't want to go see newer musicals because "oh my god, a musical?!?!?!  no way!"  At Blockbuster we had tons of people demanding a refund after seeing Sweeney Todd because they "didn't know it was gonna be a fuckin' musical"  It kind of feels to me like saying, "I don't wanna see that movie, it's fucking GAY."  Yes, it might be a different way of telling a story than what you're used to... but once you start watching it, you'll see that it has the same morals and comedy, drama and terror that "normal" movies have.  Just with a little more panache. Herein might be why I love musicals so much.  I always disagreed with the idea that "gay can't be a choice, because who would choose that?"  Guess what, if it were a choice, I would effing choose it.  More panache.

And after all, musicals are not just gay because of the stereotype of gay men in musical theater.  They are gay because they are more often than not about a person or group of people who must defy the odds, and deal with shitty circumstances, all while singing along and putting on a happy face.  They are about doomed and deviant love.  They are uplifting to people who are different.  And, as a kid, they taught me that even if I'm facing 7 children and a captain.....I should always have confidence in myself.